pantstributor

The Trip That Vander Built

Hellooooooo Pantsworld. While Sarah is doing the vacay in Ha-wa-ay, she asked me to Pantsribute my time by writing a post for “le blog.” While we all know that the overall cool factor of PoshDeluxe began to immediately plummet the second she decided to let her friend Randy offer his two cents, you might want to continue reading, because I want to tell you all about my family vacation to . . . (wait for it) . . . NASHVILLE! (pictures included in cost of admission, unlike the Country Music Hall of Fame which tacks on pretty much anything they can to their price of admission)

My wife and I decided we wanted to take some time off from the Big D. You see, temperatures were constantly varying from 98-105 for the better part of three weeks, and we couldn’t take it any more. Nashville seemed like the perfect place. It’s within driving distance (nine hours from Dallas), the temperatures never ventured above 92 degrees, it is a city (which was a must for our vacation) and expedia had a pretty awesome deal on a 4-star hotel. Done and . . . done.

Speaking of, if you ever travel to Nash Vegas, make sure that you check out the availability at the Hutton Hotel. This recently revamped business office is probably one of the nicer hotels in TN. (I’m not sure if that’s saying much). It was clean, fun, decorated nicely and, most importantly for the followers of the Kyoto Protocol, they go green. I’m sure Al Gore just pees his pants thinking about visiting his home town in a place that turns off all the lights to your room when you leave. Check it out!

Seriously – not even Dateline would blacklight these bedsheets.

Now, we were only there for two full days, so as soon as we got into town, we had to get crackin’. (It’s okay to use words like “crackin’” in the Music City. You can also say “fixin’ ta” and “triple quarter pounder w/ chesse”.) The first item on the agenda was to check out the Grand Ole Opry. Why? Because one of my favorite artists of all time just happened to be singing that night. Miss Alison Krauss. You would think that someone who had won more Grammy’s than any other woman in history would be the centerpiece of the entire show, but that’s not how the Grand Ole Opry works.

First, you must watch squaredancers.

Then they bring out an old, four and a half foot tall country music artist

You listen to said elderly little man sing a song to a Raggedy Ann doll thanking her for getting his daughter through his wife’s death. You then watch the elderly man force his doll to bow when everyone claps at the song’s ending.

After that crazy bit of awkwardness, you listen to some other artists sing whose other option that weekend was to play your local Six Flags or Nursing Home, depending on their age.

THEN you get to listen to Alison.

You watch her sing three songs!

You watch her say goodbye

And you think to yourself . . . “This Grand Ole Opry isn’t so bad after all.” You start on your way home thinking what a glorious place Nashville is and then you are jarred back into reality when across the street from the Opry complex you see a bar named after a character from the Dukes of Hazard.

The next morning, we realized that Nashville certainly had it’s share of high class. Directed by the likes of TripAdvisor and CitySearch, my wife and I found ourselves walking into the Germantown Cafe for brunch. O to the MG. This place was incredible. Because everyone reading (esp. PD, herself) would want to know, the mimosas were good. As were the Crab Cakes Benedict, Banana Bread French Toast and the “beignets” (which were really deep-fried yeast rolls rolled in cinnamon and sugar that made me vow to return prior to entering heaven which, ironically, is a place that serves only Germantown Cafe Beignets for breakfast every day).

We didn’t have the guts to take pics of food (I know, I’m not worthy), but – strangely enough – taking a picture of the menu didn’t seem to bother me.

We then headed over to the State Capitol Building and walked around long enough to discover that it was hot enough to sweat in Nashville, and apparently too hot to have the building open to visitors. This Government Major was somewhat unhappy, but satisfied with plan B – Centennial Park, home to the only actual-sized replica of the Parthenon in the world.

We read about this place on TripAdvisor and we were intrigued when we read one review from a man who goes by the name “Snakebite_Survivor” that mentioned, “I’ve been to the Parthenon in Athens, and the experience of visiting the reproduction in Nashville is at least equal to and perhaps surpasses the original.”

Seriously? There is a replica of one of the greatest relics in the world that surpasses the original? Read the review for yourself.

Realizing that it was not better to be in Nashville than in FREAKING EUROPE, my wife and I made the best of a bad situation by posing in the most awesomest way we could come up with, given our environment.

It was at this point, we came across possibly our greatest find in Nashville – Las Paletas. What is Las Paletas? Well, it’s a little shop that only sells gourmet popsicles. They have about twenty flavors and every popsicle was $2.50. They have the normal flavors like Strawberry and Watermelon. They also have spicy flavors like “Hot Chocolate” which is Chocolate and Jalapeno. This place was incredible. See?

After visiting Jennifer’s Cousin and his family, we set off for what was supposed to be one of the coolest things to do in Nashville, the Bluebird Cafe. This is a place that hosts live music seven days a week, most often in the round. The artist and their band sit in a circle facing each other while everyone else sits around them. No one is allowed to talk as the music is seen as the all-important raison d’etre. Seriously – NO SOCIALIZING. Even when the woman behind you elbows you in the back because everyone is crammed in like sardines – NO TALKING.

Because Sunday night is “no reservations” night, people line up outside the door about an hour before open.

What is that guy pointing at? McDonald’s? Or maybe it’s the twenty family members who cut in front of us because their cousin saved their spot in line. grrrrrrr.

The artist we listened to wasn’t so great and we didn’t get our food until about fifty minutes after ordering. Still, I could see this place being really cool on a normal night. If you get to be in Nashville on any decent evening, try and stop by.

Our last day in Nashville included visiting Vanderbilt’s campus – it’s so beautiful. Some of the trees there are older than our country. (I’m from Houston where most of the trees are as old as the most recent Hurricane’s aftermath) It was a beautiful place to walk around.

We ate lunch at this place that was soooo good called “Pizza Perfect”

You know it’s good because all of the doctors from the Vanderbilt Medical Center were eating there. These people know what massive amounts of sausage and cheese does to your arteries and they STILL couldn’t get enough. Afterwards, in true Posh fashion, we found a cupcake place called GiGi’s and stopped by for dessert.

The one in the back was chocolate marshmallow. I think the one in front is Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip. They were good, but they don’t beat out Society Bakery in Dallas or the Poshie Award winner in Austin, Sugar Mama’s. Still, we didn’t waste our money.

The Nightlife in Nashville is very similar to Austin, but think Honky-Tonk. After a trip to the Country Music Hall of Fame where you can add to your entry ticket a tour to see a recording studio for only $12 more and a headset to listen to hicks talk about all the stuff you’re looking at for another $5, we decided to eat at a place called Bricktown. It was started by the guy who began Houston’s and it’s pretty close to the same layout and menu . . .

That pretty much sums up our trip. If you’re still reading, uh-thank you and I’m impressed. Also, if you ever have to drive twenty hours, might I recommend The Kite Runner on audiobook? If you’re feeling happy about life, it may depress you. If you’re depressed it may cause suicidal thoughts. But there are enough happy times in the story to make the “reader” smile. It’s a good listen.

All in all, Nashville was a lot of fun. It wasn’t too crazy-hectic. It had a decent college life (which I think adds a lot to the vibrancy of a city), great restaurants and beautiful scenery. My wife and I wouldn’t be mad if we had to move there . . . If you’ve been I’d be interested to hear your take.

LINKS

Y’all saw the five-legged dog, right? If he can’t be in the freak show, I nominate his owner.

If you haven’t seen 500 Days of Summer, stop what you’re doing (even if you’re in Hawaii) and go see it . . . now

I’m debating whether or not to see HP6 on IMAX next week. I mean, it was no GOF or POA, but 3-D??? Speaking of, I really liked Coraline which you can see in 3-D at a multi-disc DVD player near you

© 2009 Poshdeluxe.