culturelux
celebrities who should be my friends
after i decided to write today’s entry, i realized that it might come off as kind of stalker-ish and weird. so, before i begin, a disclaimer:
i am not a psycho. i am actually a really nice person and have PLENTY of friendship references should anyone need some. and obvs i’m sort of kidding. except, you know, if you’re reading this and yr name is on the list, then i am COMPLETELY SERIOUS CALL ME.
ok, now that we’re square on the “i will not show up on yr doorstep with a camera/knife/bff charm” front, allow me to continue!
so, if you’ve visited my blog a few times, you’ve probably realized that i have a LOT of celebrity crushes. but i was thinking today about celebrities that i really really want to be my actual FRIENDS, and not just cos they’re famous or ridiculously good-looking. so i decided to make a list with a few *extremely logical* and highly convincing points to illustrate.
CELEBRITIES WHO SHOULD BE MY FRIEND by POSH D. LUXE
#1: KERI RUSSELL
ok, so obvs i’m a little obsessed with keri BUT NEED I MENTION THE DISCLAIMER? anyway, she’s not just on the list because she played “felicity,” i swear.
reasons why we need to have a slumber party ASAP:
1. she lives in the fort green neighborhood of brooklyn, and I LOVE THAT NEIGHBORHOOD!
2. she adores her son, and I LOVE BABIES!
3. she totally dated scott speedman in real life, and SO WOULD I!!!!!!!
4. she seems like a totally down to earth gal, and SO AM I! i mean, KIND OF!!!
#2 MANDY MOORE
i’ve had a major girl crush on mandy for foreeeevs. i think her haircut in “how to deal” is what really sealed the deal on our future friendship.
reasons why we need to go to the mall together IMMEDIATELY:
1. she is married to ryan adams, and I LOVE RYAN ADAMS!
2. she played the main character in a film based on a sarah dessen novel, and I LOVE SARAH DESSEN!
3. i really dig her sense of style, so WE COULD GO SHOPPING TOGETHER!
4. i follow her on twitter, so IT’S LIKE WE ALREADY KNOW EACH OTHER!
#3 COLIN HANKS
when colin hanks popped up on “mad men” i almost peed in my PJ pants cos he’s JUST. SO. GREAT!
reason why i would give him half of my PB&J at the lunch table:
#1: he has, like, the friendlist face in the world, and I WANT TO HUG HIM SO BAD.
#2: his dad is tom hanks, and I LOVE TOM HANKS!
#3: he plays silly games in bars, and I AM AWESOME AT SILLY GAMES!
#4: when he smiles, I SMILE!!!!
well, i think i’ll stop there, even though i could probably list a few more. cos, hello people, i don’t have THAT much extra room in my social calendar to accommodate a lot of new friends. just so you know.
also FYI CELEBRITY FRIENDSHIP APPLICATIONS ARE CURRENTLY BEING ACCEPTED BY POSH PANTS KTHX.
so, pants world, who would make yr list?!!
LINKS
j. is pretty excited about the new tv show, “glee.” and SO AM I!!!!!!! high school drama/choir nerds, can i get a what what!!!
if you missed the recent “daily show” coverage of this whole torture memo scandal thing, check it out. cos laughter makes me feel better, even about waterboarding.
so, yeah, it might be a little too twee, but i still want to see “paper hearts.” i can’t quit you, michael cera!
if you’re into “grey gardens,” this 1972 piece from ny magazine is a must read.
i’m going to hawaii this summer (for reals!!!), and here’s one thing i definitely WON’T be doing: volcano surfing.
Discussion
6 comments for “celebrities who should be my friends”
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I am TOTALLY VOLCANO SURFING.
I am happy to write a friendship reference on behalf of Posh for any interested celebrities. She makes for a most incredibly awesome friend. She bakes cookies often, she mails you surprises, she provides kick-ass CDs every season, and she’ll always volunteer to drive!
My list: RDJ, Tina Fey, Seth Green (if by friend we understand I mean BOYfriend), Jason Segel (see above), Natalie Portman and my number one always and forever PLEASE BE MY BEST FRIEND just-kidding-stalker victim: Kate Winslet. Oh, and as we discovered last girly slumber party–Colin Hanks.
i am glad to see that keri russell would still be high on your list.
since, you know, i am a person who tends towards having just a few good friends, i cannot imagine a celebrity friend applying to my little self in the way that it applies to you, sarah pants, but that said, i think i would choose:
-claire danes, when we were both 15/16 (cuz she was SO my hero then, although we have since grown apart).
-steve martin (because i would like him to be a dad-ish friend, AND the chapter about his first job working at disneyland in _born standing up_ made me fall in love with him)
and — these ones aren’t as well known, and so “celebrity” doesn’t quite apply, but they are famous:
-the couples who are the bands over the rhine and waterdeep. not that i would manage to ever get my mouth open to speak to them, but i would like to hear what they have to say in their everyday lives.
-wendell berry (who would make an amazing grandfather, and to whom i also would probably not be able to actually speak)
Let’s see… My celebrity friends… I agree with Natalie Portman. She’s so smart and awesome, and funny (“Puppies!”), and could teach me new and different ways to have short hair besides my tried and true variations on “hawks”, Mindy Kaling (we’d crack wise back and forth over brunch until we were asked to leave), and Ellen Page, because she can wear hoodies like nobody’s business.
julie, i completely agree with you on the claire danes front. when we were in high school, it’s like she was my other half. but, like many friendships, our commonalities have faded, although i will forever love her with crimson-dyed hair.
also double true on steve martin. after i read that book, i really really REALLY wanted him to be like my adopted uncle.
I would want to be friends with Ben Affleck, Toby Maguire, and Brandon Routh.