cray
NO PANTS
so, usually i post an interview on fridays, or a guest blogger. but my pantstributor didn’t quite work out for today, so… you guys will have to deal with me. again. and trust me, i don’t feel like dealing with my writing today, either, cos it’s frickin’ friday!
BUT fortunately for all of us, rescue has arrived in the form of an email. and not just any email, mind you, but ONE OF MY FAVORITE EMAILS EVER, OF ALL TIME, IN THE UNIVERSE OF THE INTERNET.
and so it’s kind of like destiny wanted me to share this email with all of you. cos destiny loves funny emails! and that doesn’t count forwards, just to be clear.
so basic in its construction, so simple in its grace, this email requires no explanation, only enjoyment of its perfection. but i will tell you that it’s from a member of our cabin at jordan and juancho’s texas wedding celebration last weekend. that’s really all you need to know.
* * *
subject line: NO PANTS
[ed note: no, i did not make that up. and yes, it was in all caps. because it is the best subject line my inbox has ever seen]
What a weekend! It seems as though I enjoyed myself so thoroughly that I have returned to Houston without my pants. Is it possible that any of y’all might have packed them by mistake? They’re 34×34, Calvin Klein blue jeans. If not, I’ll just chalk it up as a sacrifice to the wedding celebration. It was great seeing you all again (as well as meeting some of you for the first time).
Best wishes,
[name withheld to spare any kind of embarrassment, even though there should be no shame, cos this really is one of the greatest emails i have ever received]
* * *
and, as if it could get any better (IMPOSSIBLE), i later received this follow-up email:
* * *
Never mind everyone. I found them, turns out I didn’t even take them to the ranch. Sorry about that.
* * *
is there any better note on which to leave you, on a friday?
HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND, EVERYONE! LOSE YR PANTS!!!!
p.s. since i discovered how much fun “search terms” can be, i’m gonna start including a daily search term (that someone used to reach my blog) at the bottom of each entry.
SEARCH TERM SPOTLIGHT:
diamond lady 2: the business woman
someone please tell me this is a movie.
LINKS
my SNL political dreams came true last night: will ferrell appeared as w. with the mighty miss fey. the only way it could’ve been better is if, somehow, phil hartman and chris farley had been raised from the dead.
the ny times is formally backing obama, which i realize is not a surprise. but still, their articulate reasoning is a nice validation for my future vote.
major kudos to this thoughtful and sweet (pun intended) cakespy essay about letting yrself appreciate foods that might not be good for yr thighs but are most definitely good for yr heart. plus, um, marzipan mini bagels on top of cupcakes?!!! SQUEE!
i’m pretty sure this is the grossest candy i have ever seen. and by gross i mean, ten year old boys are gonna LOVE it.
YOU GUYS!! YOU CAN MAKE YR OWN MUPPET AT FAO SCHWARZ!!!!! best xmas present, ever. and i mean, for me.
has anyone heard of this new series, “kings“? it looks pretty good… and not just cos my favorite disease has been cast.
Discussion
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The two down-right disturbing this about this post:
1. The man left without his freakin’ pants (Okay, maybe that’s more funny than it is disturbing.).
2. You have a favorite disease.
well, erin, the “disease” comment was a reference to the line from “home alone”: “kevin, you’re such a disease!” which i love to repeat as much as possible.
Ahhh, I see. Honestly, when I read “favorite disease” I was (rightfully) reticent in clicking the link, thinking I may see something about “The Cholera Comedy Hour” or the like. But “Home Alone” is great- I get it. My favorite is: “Buzz’s girlfriend- Woof!”