every afternoon, i eat an apple at my desk.
and every afternoon, i stare at the tiny white spots on the skin, still believing, in some way, that those little spots are vitamins.
from whence came this insanity?
my own mother!
see, at some point in my childhood, my mom, in a desperate attempt to get me to eat an apple without her having to go through the torture of de-skinning it, told me that i HAD to eat the skin, cos that’s where the vitamins lived.
she pointed to the tiny white dots and said, “see? those are the vitamins!”
mom, i don’t know if you remember doing this or not, but i swear, you did. I SWEAR.
and you guys, i believed this lie until high school. I KNOW!!!! i am not joking. i don’t remember what year it was, but during lunch, i pointed out the “vitamins” to a friend who promptly stared at me incredulously.
friend: “sarah, you can’t really *see* the vitamins. they’re in the skin, but you don’t see them.”
me: I CANNOT BELIEVE MY MOM LIED TO ME!!!
i felt like a kid who painstakingly avoids sidewalk cracks his whole life, only to find out that his mom’s back will not, in fact, break.
of course, my parents had lied to me before. i’m talking about the whole Santa Claus Scandal, not to mention the Tooth Fairy Cover-Up. but those are the sort of fables you *expect* yr parents to tell you, and i don’t know about you guys, but i wasn’t upset when i found out the truth.
actually, i *was* upset about the tooth fairy, namely wondering, “so does this mean i won’t get paid for my teeth anymore? GAH. why didn’t i keep my mouth shut?!”
my parents never told me that the tooth fairy might KILL ME! more lies!!!
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