you guys. i think the airline industry READS THIS BLOG.
and now it hates me cos i was talking smack last monday!!
on friday, henri and i were supposed to leave for boston at 11:20 AM… but our flight didn’t leave until 6:20 PM!!! WHAT IS THAT? fortunately, we left the airport and just hung out, but still.
and then, last night, my flight home was delayed and i didn’t make it back to my apartment until 3 AM.
I WILL NEVER FLY AGAIN.
until october.
anyway, i’m telling you this now so that yr sympathy for me will improve yr perception of today’s blog. because i am not above the pity vote. and i’m not sure if this entry will actually be coherent.
today, i’d like to talk about cake. which i realize is not unusual. but i’ve been inspired by this incredible site called cake wrecks, which chronicles the most tacky and ridiculous and downright scary cakes you could possibly imagine.
which is truly a travesty, cos there should NEVER EVER be such a thing as a bad cake. it goes against nature. it’s like, an ugly puppy.
but, as long as evil exists in this world, there will apparently be really scary baby cakes with abnormally large heads and no bodies:
sofia, guess what you’re getting in the mail to celebrate baby nathan’s arrival!!
seriously, though, WHAT IS THAT. and how are you supposed to cut it without feeling like the creepy eepy baby eater in “pan’s labyrinth”?
oh, but it gets better, my friends. please PLEASE check out the website, where you can see such gems as:
and my personal favorite (airbrush! holla!):
looking over the site, i couldn’t help but reminisce about the birthday cakes of my past (and yes, i did have a brief scrooge-fantasy where the cakes of my present, past and future come to visit me and IT WAS DELICIOUS). and so, i present to you a Brief History of Sarah’s Birthday Cakes.
btw, there are no dates, cos i have a horrible memory (except for food)
1. The Brownie Era
for a few years, i insisted on brownies over cake, because i realized that brownies are genetically superior, genes being CHOCOLATE.
2. Ice Cream Cake
i think i had ice cream cake one year, but i wasn’t that impressed. baskin robbins, YOU PUT PEANUT BUTTER IN YR CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM. i think you can do better with yr cakes.
3. Great American Cookie Company Cake
this is, hands down, my favorite kind of birthday cake. it’s like pizza but COOKIES!!! even the frosting, which i’m not normally a huge fan of, is super tasty. my sweet sweet mother even delivered one of these to me in college. because she loves me.
4. Teddy Bear Cake
the year of my infamous house-plants-in-the-living-room, five-minutes-of-sheena-queen-of-the-jungle-before-my parents-realized-there-was-nudity jungle slumber party, my mom made me a cake shaped like a teddy bear. because teddy bears come from the jungle, obvs. i remember it was peanut butter and I LOVED IT.
even at one year of age, i had my priorities straight. i also want to note that this was my second, quite possibly my THIRD, cake for my first birthday. it’s called: the only grandchild.
5. Smurfette Cake
i *think* i had a cake with smurfette on it for my smurfette-themed sixth birthday party. but i could be wrong.
6. Julie’s Grandmother’s Cake
i know this shouldn’t count, cos it wasn’t actually for MY birthday, but every year in college, julie’s grandmother would send her this incredible plum cake for her birthday, which she would generously share with all of us (i swear, the girl is a saint for being willing to part with one crumb of that deliciousness). i have the recipe, so i’ve made it a few times, but it’s just not the same without a grandmother’s love (and postal delivery. cake is my favorite kind of mail).
ok, now it’s yr turn. what kind of cakes did you guys have as a kid? ninja turtles? barbies with cake skirts (note: always wanted one but never got it. thanks FOR NOTHING, MOM)? anything insane or elaborate? like, maybe, a full scale cake model of yrself?
LINKS
john sent me the link to this totally fun website that reminds me of making jar sand sculptures at vacation bible school. except more high-tech.
you guys, i still can’t believe bernie mac died. so weird and sad. in tribute, jezebel posted this great clip from “the original kings of comedy.”
finally, i’ve discovered the sure-fire way to actually win a stuffed animal from one of those claw games. little naomi, c’mere! (seriously, watch the video. amazing).
the NYT has a slideshow of director roland emmerich’s (”indepence day” suckas!), and WOW. stuffed zebras? a ball made of barbies? the pope sitting under the stairs? dude. where is “cribs” when you need it?!!!!!
after consisting slaughtering songs via rock band, my brain cannot comprehend how someone can score 100 percent on the hardest guitar hero song. nor can i comprehend having that amount of free time.
jezebel weighs in on the whole twilight/”breaking dawn” phenomenon, and, per usual, i totally agree with them. i’m two-thirds of the way through “breaking dawn” and can barely bring myself to finish it. ugh.
i totally know what i’m being for halloween: ANIME SARAH! complete with freaky big eyes! and i thought those vampire contacts were cool…
maybe it’s cos the trailer uses a rogue wave song (buddy holly cover), but “rachel gets married” looks really good. plus i am a total sucker for anne hathaway.
I sadly don’t remember any crazy fun birthday cakes.
I want Chef Duff of Ace of Cakes to make my cake. Seriously. How cool would that be?
When I was younger I wasn’t a big fan of cakes. I had a Pizza birthday party. As I have gotten older not only do I like the band but I will knock back a good piece of cake. I agree with the cookie cake. Those things must be made with some sort of narcotic because I can’t get enough of it.
the life size bride cake on cake wrecks is freaking amazing. if only we could get married again…
As someone who really doesn’t like cake I have a few memories that stand out…
1. World History - Bull Cake - We made the cake to “sacrifice” a bull for our project on Macedonia/Crete/One of those ancient Greekish cultures. This might have been the same project where someone made soup out of a goats head…
2. Art Anatomy - Torso Cake - We had to create a sculpture of a part of the body using non traditional materials. One group made a cake in the shape of a torso and used pull and peel licorice as the muscles. That group also put Buddy Jesus as one of the figures in their life size figure drawing.
And, I am waiting desperately for my school librarian to read Breaking Dawn so I can discuss it with her…
strawberry shortcake cake!!
My mom always tried valiantly to make interesting cakes. I love her to death but sometimes execution didn’t match up with imagination. Probably my fault for wanting things that are too adventurous. heh.
The rest of the cake site is absolutely amazing. Some of those cakes are absolutely scary.
only to be eclipsed in scariness by Roland Emmerich’s house. Dear lord man! Get yourself together!
I totally remember making jar sand sculptures… only I don’t think it was VBS it was Pioneer Club, the Boy Scout alternative that the church I grew up at had on Wednesday nights for the elementary kids that weren’t old enough to go into Confirmation yet.
BTW, I noticed in your interview that you went to Ecclesia for a while. That’s Chris Seay’s church isn’t it? I read his book on the Sopranos a few years ago.
Since Becky doesn’t like cake we had Otis Spunkmeyer muffins for her birthday when she was in high school.
crap. I meant to say, “I noticed in the Friday interview”. My bad. It’s been a long day. Now back to sending job inquiry e-mails… (which is really great when I can’t even write blog comments properly.)
Baby Sarah: “Come ON, Mom, quit fooling around! Give me the cake already!”
I was a big, big fan of the mint chocolate chip ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins. There’s also a bakery/catering place in Lufkin called the Lunch Box, and they had this to-die-for white cake w/ caramel and whipped cream frosting and tons of nuts, called the Nuttin Special, and I got that for several years and then surprised Matt with it when we visited my dad in Lufkin on his birthday. It withstood the test of time–still insanely delicious.
The girl in the claw machine just made my day.
Our friends got Chris and me a GIANT cookie cake for our birthdays this year. It was amazing.
When I was little, my mom made me a mint chocolate chip ice cream birthday cake. It was also amazing.
This post is evil! Now I really really want cake!
Ok, so the plot of that Breaking Dawn book sounds awesome and intense, but apparently is not…. I agree that we should rate books on awesomeness.
But back to the homepage of the Jezebel website… Phelps a pretty boy? Come on? Take away his freakish third world body and he is one fugly, fugly man.
I’m just saying.
i would like to read an article that delves into why so many adults like twilight, even when they don’t REALLY like twilight, in the sense that they don’t like what is propagated in the books. like me and talena!
i guess the cleolinda site is kind of like that.
I had an Annie cake for my 4th birthday. I was obsessed with Annie the musical and the movie. My grandmother actually made me a little red Annie dress for my birthday and then I wore it for Halloween later that year.
I also am a huge fan of Great American Cookie Co. cookie cakes (I love that icing!) and ice cream cakes (mint chocolate chip!).
For my 30th birthday, I told my husband I want a Charm City/Ace of Cakes cake since I will officially be old and I deserve something incredibly amazing, but they don’t ship their cakes. And since I won’t be in the Maryland/DC area this September, no Duff cake for me. : (
My grandma, we call her g’ma, is an amazing cake decorator. My other grandmother, lala, also makes amazing cakes but not really decorated. Some of her cakes they used to auction off at a school fundraiser and seriously, her cake was the big auction item on the list and would go for like 400 dollars. Seriously. Hey, you might have had some at my wedding, Sarah, it was the groom’s cake. The carrot cake with cream cheese icing.
Anyways, back to decorated cakes:
Cookie monster
Strawberry shortcake
Rainbow Brite
Care Bears
You know, the usual suspects.
was that ann or michelle? if ann, uh, you had a wedding?
Sorry, it was Michelle. Using Ann’s computer. Way sorry for the confusion. Am slightly embarrassed.