Poshdeluxe

gin blossoms: hold me down

so i went to my ten year high school reunion.

holy shit.

it was awesome. it was overwhelming. it was incredibly, incredibly awkward.

to provide you with a point of reference, here’s a photo from our “senior lunch” back in 1997:

top (l-r): viola, jennifer, seth, katie. bottom (l-r): emily, talena, me, becky.

(special thanks to becky, for scanning this little gem)

why yes, i WAS a goody goody in high school. thanks for asking.

so, saturday night, a small group of us gathered together to prep for the reunion by laughing over old photo albums and staring at impossibly embarrassing yearbook photos.

talena, on the left, is the first friend i made when i moved to houston. we met at her neighborhood pool and then went to the mall with her older friend, holly, who was actually cool enough to shop at 5-7-9. i SO WANTED to buy clothes there, but i wasn’t old enough (paging puberty… paging puberty…).

se, in the middle, threw unbelievably cray cray pool parties in junior high. and by cray cray, i mean we had a SODA FIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE POOL! coke cans were flying everywhere! there was so much foam! i know, we were out of control. also, we played a ton of truth or dare, which resulted in me licking a stick of deodorant. i guess it must’ve been a pretty embarrassing question.

katie, on the right, rode the bus with me until we were old enough (cool enough) to drive. she saved me from having to sit next to the loud, scary boys in the back that liked to punch each other for no good reason and the girls who got into hair-pulling fights and made the bus driver pull over in the middle of the street. god bless you, katie.

the pictures brought back a flood of memories, including randy’s favorite pair of jean shorts. jennifer, his wife, was extremely excited to learn about this crucial piece of randy that has been hidden away for so long.

jennifer also got to hear about the time that talena left a half-drunk starbucks frappuccino in my “trash stash” (the trash bag in my car) where it lived for a few weeks until deciding to make a break for it, all over randy’s pants. i’ve never seen randy so close to being actually *mad*. his phone call to talena began, “LISTEN, SISTER!”

i sat next to rachel, who i hadn’t seen in a few years. we met through our mutual, ridiculous love for theater in junior high, and i remember thinking she had the most amazing curly hair i’d ever seen. in high school, rachel threw the BEST slumber parties, which included sliding down the stairs in sleeping bags, dance competitions and, of course, frequent trips over to trey’s house on the next street, cos hello, there were BOYS THERE!!!!!!! EEEEEEEE!!!

keriann, who is totally and completely preggers, opted not to attend the reunion but did swing by the flying saucer with her husband, mark.

my earliest memory of keriann comes from seventh grade gym. she was wearing our glamorous P.E. outfits (grey top and black shorts) and glasses. let’s just say things went uphill from there.

buoyed by our time together, we headed over to the hotel. i honestly felt like i was about to strap myself in to a rollercoaster car… i had that scared, excited twitching in my stomach. you know what i mean? like, WHAT IF I FALL OUT OF THE CAR? WHAT IF I DIE ON THIS RIDE? yeah, like that.

and then i saw this:

and all of a sudden, i realized that THIS REUNION WAS ACTUALLY HAPPENING. I WAS ABOUT TO STEP INTO A ROOM WITH PEOPLE I HAVEN’T SEEN IN TEN YEARS.

suddenly, this whole thing didn’t seem like such a great idea. in fact, the first thirty minutes were, to put it nicely, more horrific than “hostel” (and i haven’t even seen “hostel”, cos i hate horror movies, so yeah, that bad). the hotel ballroom had the ambiance of a love’s gas station, and the garish lighting wasn’t doing anyone any favors.

rachel flew in all the way from michigan. obviously, she didn’t regret her decision at all.

and ashely was having a GREAT TIME. REALLY. GREAT.

ashley was in the whole band crowd, so we didn’t hang out a ton in high school, even though we knew each other and liked each other (i mean, i think she liked me. i hope she liked me. i pray to god she liked me cos i really needed people to like me back then). ten years later, she’s someone i’d actually like to get to know *better*, and i think you’ll understand why by the end of this series of entries (hint: she makes great photo faces, which i then use on my blog, which then makes my life look amazingly fun and cool).

anyway anyway, things at the love’s rest stop were looking grim.

fortunately, two things happened:

1) more people showed up

2) we had access to alcohol, and alcohol doesn’t care if you were popular in high school or not. alcohol does not judge. alcohol will write “2 Sweet 2 Be 4-gotten” in everyone’s yearbook and MEAN IT.

i indulged in a little discount drinking. because i am classy.

seriously, though, it did get better. in fact, it became awesome. it became everything i wanted it to be and more. sure, there were no hit men, but i’m ok with that.

my beautiful friend jessica and her husband jim showed up fashionably late.

apparently, jessica’s hair dresser couldn’t make her hair big enough. according to my source (wearing a pin striped shirt with glasses), jessica kept saying, “BUT I’M FROM DALLAS! I HAVE TO HAVE BIG HAIR!” this is one of the multitude of reasons that i love jessica. i used to pick her up before high school every morning, and in the span of ten minutes, she would do her hair and make-up perfectly. even with speed bumps. also, if you ever have a question about etiquette (as we all often do), give jessica a call. she’s like scarlett o’hara, except without the crayness. and also, she would never eat dirt, because that’s disgusting.

when someone i knew (correction: liked) walked through the door, my heart would do a little squee dance. this happened with jennie baik, who flew in from new york.

talena, jennie and seth were among my first friends in sixth grade. i remember making little pins in support of jennie’s extremely influential and earth shattering campaign for student council. i don’t think she won, though, cos people weren’t ready for her fresh ideas and innovative reforms. and also cos candy ramos gave out sweet tarts as bribes.

i can’t TELL you how good it was to see seth over the weekend. well, ok, i’ll try. IT WAS SO GOOD!!! seth was the first person in junior high to wear a hypercolor t-shirt, so we met when i asked him if i could touch it. thus, chemically treated fabric sparked a life-long friendship (we even went on to rice together). apparently, people at the reunion liked to introduce seth as “our valedictorian,” which obviously completely encompasses seth today. he loved that.

you can see from this picture that we started actually enjoying ourselves (less fake smiles, more zexy faces). erika, on the left, is someone that i don’t keep in touch with but am now planning on becoming her jane austin pen pal. we shall write letters to each other every day, describing the walk we took through the garden and the newest roll of taffeta at the general store. seriously, though, i love this woman. i remember her crying during our class debate on “hiroshima” in sophomore english after she and the “hooligan row” got in this huge fight that boiled down to “US OR THEM! US OR THEM!” or maybe it was just mrs. williams that cried. hmm. anyway, erika looked GREAT. gah, it was so so so wonderful to see people looking good!!!!

well, most people. according to a source that has asked to go nameless due to her belief in social etiquette, “80% of the girls from our class look better than they did in high school. as for the boys… i would say, 10%.” harsh, maybe, but statistics don’t lie, people.

i got really excited when i saw quentin walker, my old junior high lab partner!!!!!!!

in fact, when i saw him, i completely interrupted his conversation with the lovely sabrina so i could ask him if he remembered the periodic table of elements that our teacher (mrs. green?) put on display. she created an element using each person’s name and picture. i believe mine was pitresium. i’m thinking it is probably an element found in cupcakes and/or champagne.

even though we’ve all grown up (sort of) and some of us have changed a lot (sort of), there are aspects of high school ingrained so deeply in our minds that they will never be dislodged. even with intense therapy. for example, the fact that the bathroom will always be a place where you can escape and gossip in safety:

just check for feet under the stalls before you say something too juicy.

another thing that will never change? the popular girls will ALWAYS be popular. even if they’ve gotten nicer. or not. even if they are now more orange than oompa loompas. even if their hairstyle has remained unchanged. they will always be the queen bees, the mean girls, the heathers.

and yes, they will still take yr table. even if you put yr umbrellas and purses on it.

[stay tuned for part 2, featuring drunken dancing, trash talking and my greatest honor to date]