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a fond texas farewell to tim

the langley schools music project: desperado

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when tim moved to austin last summer, we all knew it was only temporary. but hey! we had a year together! and it was gonna rule!

unfortunately, it ruled so hard that it flew by like a turbojet.

on friday, all of tim’s fans in austin gathered together to celebrate our favorite shrieker. and boy, did we send him out in style… TEXAS STYLE!

after a tasty, tasty dinner at habana, we headed, of course, to mugshots. what’s a last night in austin without mugshots? dry and expensive, that’s what.

here’s jessica and amber (you can tell jessica is crying inside, while amber seeks solace in her $2.50 drink):

here’s henri and matt, making fun of above picture:

matt, i never knew how incredibly coy you could be.

after our stop at mugshots, we headed WAY out of the city limits to a bar called “the circle country club.” i’ll gloss over the, uh, altercation that occurred at a gas station between the cashier and a few members of our group over the exact time of midnight.

ANYWAY

the circle country club is… not really a country club. it’s not posh. it’s certainly not members only. it actually looks like two temporary buildings (some call them “trailers”) smooshed together and bedecked with a generous helping of neon beer signs.

why, you ask, would we go to such a place?

well, i think i just told you. oh and also KARAOKE!!!!!!!!!!

once we arrived, amber and i carefully combed through the song lists:

matt, robin (his sister) and her friend reno got into a rousing game of pool:

i know the picture’s dark, but it kinda gives you a feel for the place (read: BEER NEON). during this game, a man in a cowboy hat looked over at robin and then patted his knee. HE PATTED HIS KNEE AT HER.

fortunately, she did what any good cowgirl does: she kicked him in the groin. ha ha ok no, she didn’t. i wish she had, though. man, that would’ve been awesome and totally in character with circle country club etiquette.

the karaoke at this place is… unlike any karaoke you have ever witnessed. i promise. not only are all of the songs country, but so are the singers.

the guy on the left is the one who runs the karaoke, while the woman on the right, also named robin, was definitely the superstar of the night. if this was american idol, she’d be kelly clarkson. except more sugar mama-ish.

i think this guy sang a hymn. i’m not kidding.

this was my ALL TIME FAVORITE COUPLE OF THE NIGHT. i can’t remember what they sang (like i know the titles of country songs?!!) but it was AMAZING.

i mean, just LOOK at that guy. he is LARGE and freaking in CHARGE. and he’s not wearing a t-shirt under his overalls!!! i repeat, THERE IS NO T-SHIRT UNDER THOSE OVERALLS. and really, doesn’t a gigantic denim jacket cover all yr fashion bases? yes, it does.

later, he came back (!!!!!) and performed “bad to the bone.” you know, “ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-BAAAAD!” OMG it was absolutely the most perfect moment in the history of the universe. i think i time traveled to all of my previous lives and we all held hands and danced in field of white lilies under a violet sky.

he even turned his hat backwards to add authenticity to his performance!!!!!!

finally, we got up the courage to hit the stage and break the country monopoly in the only way we know how: with tiffany.

amber and i belted out, “i think we’re alone now,” to a sea of confused faces. i don’t think 80’s pop had been sung within these walls since, well, the 80s. i could just hear the old guys around the bar saying, “well, look at them there whippersnappers, shakin’ up this joint!”

tim and i then sealed the deal with third eye blind’s “jumper.” cos who doesn’t love a breezy little ditty about suicide?!!!

i love the anguish on my face. seriously, my friend, i really wish you would step back from that ledge. LOOK AT MY FACE! I AM NOT KIDDING AROUND! STEP BACK RIGHT NOW!

we were obviously the youngest people there, not to mention our cityfolk pants. my boots, plus matt and tim’s “western” shirts, didn’t quite cut it. so matt attempted the cowboy snarl:

matt’s the sheriff in these parts, so don’t mess around or you’ll be in deep cow dung, ya’hear?

for our final performance, we decided to give the circle country club something it had never before experienced, nor will it probably ever experience again: hollaback girl.

if those old crusty cowboys didn’t love us before, they LOVED us now.

matt said it was one of the best four minutes of his entire life.

once we were finished sashaying and going “sh!” (i really couldn’t bring myself to say the real word in front of these nice country folk), amber sat down and reveled in the glory of our performance:

robin reclaimed the stage with a stirring rendition of “desperado.” we put our arms around each other (ok, at least i did) and swayed while singing along.

i felt our souls rise up and mix together amidst the neon and plastic beer signs. it was beautiful.

the last song was a slow number, so we got up and danced! cos that’s what you do at a country bar!

apparently you also drink bud light at a country bar. i think i was unduly influenced by the neon signs.

here’s amber and matt, two stepping. or something.

as the bar closed, the karaoke guy came up to the gals and gave us fatherly pats on the back. “you guys were great! you gotta come back, and get here earlier next time so we can really get into it!”

oh you KNOW we are SO going back to the CCC. all summer long, baby!

all in all, i think we gave tim a fantastic last night to remember.

grandpa tim, i’ll miss you so badly! who will scream with me? who will shriek with girlish laughter? who will refuse to eat any sort of dip during tv nights? who will keep me company at billions of alamo shows? who will fend off my attempts to eat you when i’m pretending to be “the host” monster? WHO, I ASK YOU?

like beyonce says, you’re irreplaceable, my friend.

come back soon, ya’hear?

© 2007 Poshdeluxe.