Archive for November, 2005

i am thankful for thanksgiving

thanksgiving was lovely.

although i’m still not that great at always being thankful. but i’m trying.

my holiday included:

  • two pieces of buttermilk pie (for this i am truly thankful)
  • an eighth year reunion with ye olde high school gang (pictures forthcoming)
  • pride & prejudice, during which i melted into a puddle of sarah pants
  • the decoration of the family xmas tree, featuring the hanging of
    my all-time favorite ornaments: the miss piggy angel, the sparkly ice
    cream cone, the not so sparkly ice cream cone that i made in third
    grade that really should have disintegrated by now, princess leia and
    the disco heart.
  • shopping on “black friday” cos i am a bad person. sorry, adbusters.
  • dinner with ray, seth e. and stacey, during which stacey kept
    prying for embarrasing seth stories while ray and i just kept telling
    our own shameful tales cos we’ve got nothing on seth except the first
    time he got trashed and jumped on the hotel coffeetable in his
    underwear while pretending to be a velociraptor.
  • zero schoolwork, which seemed perfectly reasonable at the time
    but now i’ve realized that papers don’t write themselves. stupid
    papers. i am NOT thankful for you.
  • crazy blooming tea with sofia in fabulous fall weather
  • coffee with erik with a stop at this marvelous new traffic sign:

speaking of love, here’s a great compilation of people’s responses when asked: what do you do with yr ex’s stuff after the break-up?

more importantly, here’s an AWESOME guide on how to be the creepiest stalker ever (with thanks to jane returner for the link). read this and you will die from either laughter or complete and utter mortification on this girl’s behalf (who, by the way, uses the name mary secret mysterypants!!! which i will allow cos she’s so hilarious. and crazy).

happy josh katz day!

today, josh katz (among others) is getting officially sworn is as a
lawyer. i don’t really know what exactly he will be swearing to do, but
i’m assuming it’s things like upholding the law and helping out friends
with speeding tickets.

i told him last night at mugshots that today could *officially* be henceforth known as:

JOSH KATZ DAY

and now that it’s etched into xanga stone, it’s for real.

i think JOSH KATZ DAY should mean i get a day off… but so far, i’m still here.

anyway, to celebrate JOSH KATZ DAY, i will do the following:

1) listen to some elliot smith
2) pretend i’m a huge cardinals fan
3) eat something with st. louis origins. i don’t know what that will be. yet.
4) speak in legalese as much as possible
5) drink a beer

so… tort reform… eh. blah blah blah.

anyway, congrats joshua pants. i’m so proud of you (even though you recently accused me of pedophilia. i’ll let that go).

HAPPY JOSH KATZ DAY!!!!!!

p.s. BREAKING NEWS: did you know that hershey’s makes kisses with
cherry cordial insides?!!!!!! this is incredible!!!! my candy world is
complete!!!!

p.p.s. i am really tempted to send something to this website.

thousands of bouncing balls = secret to happiness

remember that photo i posted a while back, with all of the rubber balls bouncing down a street in san francisco?

well, now you can see the actual film, with thousands and thousands of brightly colored balls pouring down the street and wreaking a gentle, whimsical havoc.

even though it’s a commercial, it is truly one of the most wonderful things i’ve ever seen.

it may take a while to download, but trust me, it’s worth it.

it might even make yr day.

the end (for now)

how to catch and hold a man

i read this highly thought-provoking article in the times yesterday, “what’s a modern girl to do?” from maureen dowd’s upcoming book, are men necessary: when sexes collide. it is WELL WORTH yr time to read this… but if you are just super busy pants, here are a few excerpts…

[p.s. let me know what you think... i lurve talking about
feminism/sexuality/gender issues. and boys, i especially want to hear
yr responses]

**************

I thought [my mother] was just being Old World, like my favorite jade, Dorothy Parker, when she wrote:

By the time you swear you’re his,

Shivering and sighing,

And he vows his passion is

Infinite, undying -

Lady, make a note of this:

One of you is lying.

**************

My mom gave me three essential books on the subject of men. The first,
when I was 13, was “On Becoming a Woman.” The second, when I was 21,
was “365 Ways to Cook Hamburger.” The third, when I was 25, was “How to
Catch and Hold a Man,” by Yvonne Antelle. (”Keep thinking of yourself
as a soft, mysterious cat.. . .Men are fascinated by bright, shiny
objects, by lots of curls, lots of hair on the head . . . by bows,
ribbons, ruffles and bright colors.. . .Sarcasm is dangerous. Avoid it
altogether.”)

***************

Sylvia Ann Hewlett, an economist and the author of “Creating a Life:
Professional Women and the Quest for Children,” a book published in
2002, conducted a survey and found that 55 percent of 35-year-old
career women were childless. And among corporate executives who earn
$100,000 or more, she said, 49 percent of the women did not have
children, compared with only 19 percent of the men.

***************

Female sexuality has been a confusing corkscrew path, not a serene
progressive arc. We had decades of Victorian prudery, when women were
not supposed to like sex. Then we had the pill and zipless encounters,
when women were supposed to have the same animalistic drive as men.
Then it was discovered - shock, horror! - that men and women are not
alike in their desires. But zipless morphed into hookups, and the more
one-night stands the girls on “Sex and the City” had, the grumpier they
got.

***************

It was naïve and misguided for the early feminists to tendentiously
demonize Barbie and Cosmo girl, to disdain such female proclivities as
shopping, applying makeup and hunting for sexy shoes and cute
boyfriends and to prognosticate a world where men and women dressed
alike and worked alike in navy suits and were equal in every way.

But
it is equally naïve and misguided for young women now to fritter away
all their time shopping for boudoirish clothes and text-messaging about
guys while they disdainfully ignore gender politics and the seismic
shifts on the Supreme Court that will affect women’s rights for a
generation.